Where does God want me?

It's been a rough couple of years.  That is probably the understatement of the decade. 

Vicious emeny attacks in every possible area:  Family, Marriage, Finances, Health, Home, Children.  I work alone.  Ministry flourishes.  Clubs grow.  Student Leaders grow.  Sponsors grow.  I'm working harder than I have ever worked.  I'm now working with 6 clubs, which turns out to be 7 sponsors and about 570 kids a week. 

I've been trying to figure out where I need to be.  Finances is the area that screams to me.  We struggle.  What am I doing?  Shouldn't I be helping more?

Last weekend, my car broke.  Badly.  4 hours away from home.  A newly installed water pump disintergated, causing the card to over heat and my head gasket to go.  No money to replace the car and a difficult repair job.  Do you get the picture? 

So, I prayed.  A simple prayer.  God, if you want me to stay in ministry, you are going to have to give me a car. 

And then, because of my great faith, I started looking for a job. 

I mean really:  a car.  Why don't I pray that the mountain be moved . . .  Perhaps I could pray to win the lottery. . .  Really.

My dad called my husband today.  My parent's church was given a Ford van that needs some transmission work.  Could Dean do that?  Did we want that?

Did you get the message?  I weep as I write this.  God wants me to stay in ministry.  I got the message - I don't know if I will get the car, but I got the message.  And the message is probably more important than the car.

God called me to ministry in Pearland.  I need to raise an army of caring adults to help me help students & sponsors reach their schools.  I need to raise my salary, so I can help my family.

God's doing something.  Do you want to be a part of it?

Financial contributions can be mailing to: 
Cross in the City - Pearland
1320 Scott St., Pasadena, TX 77506

Sadness, Sadness, Sadness . . .

On the way to JH East this morning, I got a phone call no one ever wants:  A 7^th grade boy from that school had committed suicide the night before.  Sorrow, Sorrow, Sorrow.  He attended both the JH East CITY Club and the Ignite Bible study, there is the hope that he might have known the truth, the way and the life.  But, you can't help but wonder about the despair that causes a 13 year old to give up on life.

However, at the CITY club leadership meeting this morning, our student leaders talked about, came up with a plan, cleared it with the principal.  After each 1^st period class was notified of what had happened by a counselor, the students were invited to visit with a grief counselor or gather at the school's flag pole.  A large group of students gathered - about 100 or so, read some verses and prayed, led by two of our leadership students.  They came up with this idea on their own, with just verse suggestions from the sponsor and I. 

It was a joy to watch these students being salt and light on their campus in such a sad situation.

Donna got a new (to her) oven today!

  This has been a long time coming . . . But I am amazed at how God worked it out, like only He can.
  Donna, this woman I have met at McDonald's, needed a oven.  Donna works at McDonald's.  I'm in there often - for breakfast, for my much needed diet Dr. Pepper, for various meetings with various people and groups.  I am intrigued by the concept of marketplace ministry, so I make the effort to learn the workers names and to say hi to them.  One day, they all sat with me! 
(I often think that the fast food workers of today are the modern day "shepherds" of the Christmas story.)
  I remember that a little before Thanksgiving, I overheard Donna telling people that she and her husband would be going to Golden Corral for Thanksgiving, because her oven didn't work, so she couldn't cook dinner.  At that point, I asked, "gas or electric?" because I thought my husband, Dean might run into something. 
  Around this time, Dean hurt his back and he just wasn't getting better. At some point, I knew, with Dean's hurt back, it was going to take more than Dean and I to help Donna get a oven. 
  At some point, I posted on my facebook page that I had a friend that needed an oven and Joe Horodyski responded that he might know of one.
  Then on 12/4, I posted again that she needed an oven and wouldn't that make a great Christmas project for a small group.  I didn't have any takers.
  So, at this point, this has taken maybe two months.  Perhaps, I should point out here that if I had money and a truck and I could lift an oven by myself, I guess I wouldn't need anyone else.  And maybe things would be quicker.
  Friday, I got a call that Garden Road Baptist church would be cleaning out their old building and it was time for the oven to go.  I alerted Donna, who I'm sure, after all this time, thought she was never getting a stove.
  Saturday, my daughter had an ear infection, so I had to take her to the emergency room.  On the way, I breezed thru McDonalds and saw Pastor Daniel Davis of Covenant Community Church and I quickly explained the situation - the oven was ready, I had no truck, I'm on the way to the ER with Allie, have you met Donna?  Can you exchange phone numbers?  Could you help me?  And I left.  (Allie had a major ear infection, a ruptured ear drum, but she is healing.)
Maybe God needed me to get out of the way . . .
  Well, today, it happened.  Daniel contacted Justin, who contacted me.  Justin had me call JourDan.  I met JourDan at GRBC and someone else met him there to help him get the oven into Donna's.  So the good people of Covenant Community got the Garden Road Baptist Church's oven to Donna.
  How many people did God use to get an oven to Donna:  me, Daniel Davis, Joe Horodyski, Vicki Frame, Justin Mullins, JorDan (with the truck), Andrew and I'm afraid I might be leaving someone else out.  Seven that I can name who did one thing or another to help make this happen.
  Only God can orchestrate getting the oven out of Garden Road Baptist Church's old building by the good people of Covenant Community.  It makes you feel like you are part of a body . . .

In Satan's Crosshairs

I haven't mailed out a letter for several years.  I wrote on this year that I am pleased with, but I don't think I am going to be able to mail it.  I did want to get the word out.

I’m in Satan’s cross hairs.  Do you ever feel like that?  That is where I feel like I am living.

 

I haven’t written a ministry letter for 3 years and I really want this year to be different – I can’t tell you how often I have started this letter.

 

I have spent my time helping on campus Christian Clubs (since 2007), Baccalaureate (since 1999) and the Pearland Youth Ministry Alliance (since 1991) – Just as a reminder of what I have been doing in Pearland.

 

2009 was a year where everything was looking up.  Club ministry was really coming together.  People were coming to help.  We were becoming a team: the vision (and the task) was becoming clearer.

 

2010 was the pivotal year.  At the very end of the year, the club team was destroyed by a divisive partner.  Baccalaureate and the Pearland Youth Ministry Alliance were taken away by a divisive youth pastor.  Officially, my work with on Campus Christian Clubs was taken away from me as well.

 

2011 was the healing and affirming year.  After the move by youth pastors to put me out of the school club program, I had two simple goals:  Finish the school year helping out one club and move out of Pearland to another community.  By April, I realized that I was doing more clubs and working with more students than I had before clubs were taken away from me.  Graciously, someone pointed out that God will prosper you in what He has called you to do – I couldn’t have figured this out.  My calling was affirmed.  I did not attend Baccalaureate 2011 – for the first time since 1994, but I was informed that it was poorly done and poorly attended – the lowest attendance ever.  This was both a balm to my ego, but it was also an assault to my community spirit – how could they ruin such a brilliant opportunity to influence students to godliness?

 

The doors to the other community closed:  Unexpectedly and unexplainably, leaving me to either continue ministry in Pearland or get another job.  I chose to go thru the doors God was opening.

 

By November, something was taking place in me.  Words were falling out of my mouth that were not mine.  The words and insights were brilliant.  I started to realize that while I was the point person for unity and working together in my community, it was unity and working together that was Satan’s target, not me.  As wounded as I was, my community and students were more hurt in this.  I grieved for my community, for the students I so loved.  I moved from licking my own wounds to a new healing.

 

I started to view what I was doing differently.  Rather than a simple wife and mother, doing what she could, I saw myself as uniquely called, uniquely trained, uniquely designed for my community, for clubs for students, for such a time as this.  Rather than just a good thing, I started to see myself as engaged in strategic warfare for a generation.  This shift in image is crucial.   A critical person in a critical position who was called by God to bring people and churches together to reach students for Christ. 

 

Who?  me? 

By 2012, I was still finding and helping more clubs.  Clubs were growing and multiplying.  Student leaders were growing in their ability to lead. 

 

I attended Baccalaureate 2012.  Attendance was even lower – less than 50 people.  I was distraught to see this God opportunity becoming less than it's potential and not impacting students the way I knew was possible.  

 

On a personal note, I was facing more and more personal challenges.  Overwhelming financial difficulties, martial issues, overwhelming mental health and behavioral issues with a child, personal depression and suicidal thoughts, home and personal issues – the list made me feeling like I was battling on all fronts.

 

Summer 2012, I was ready to quit.  It was too hard.  The issues were overwhelming.  I could not work another year for annual salary of $5000.  I began looking for a job.  I even interviewed.  At this point, I would say I was depressed and definitely in some kind of spiritual battle, as I was vacillating.  When I looked at me and looked at what I was doing, I reminded myself of James 1: 6: ⁶ . . .  because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 

 

That was me – Like a wave of the sea – ready to quit one day, ready to enroll in graduate school the next, ready to stand up and fight the next.  I could see what I was doing, but I couldn’t stop it.  I couldn’t see what God wanted me to do, so I couldn’t pick His direction.  I was willing, but completely unable.

 

When the school year is starting, I decide I’m going to quit a troublesome club and I will help other clubs until I can find other employment.  I’m still determined to solve my financial problems in my way.  Do you see it?  I’m going to leave my true calling, my true purpose:  Satan nearly has me beaten down.

 

I’m in Satan’s Cross hairs and he is trying by any means to take me down.  Because: I am “A critical person in a critical position who was called by God to bring people and churches together to reach students for Christ.”

 

Will you pray for me?  I know who I am and I know what God has called me to.  Satan is aiming to take me and my family down by any means possible. 

 

Will you consider giving?  It will take as a little as 100 people giving $25/month or $300/year – to keep me in this critical position?  Will you be one of my 100?  Will you be 2? 

 

At this point, I am helping with 6 clubs about 600 students a week.  I have my finger in the Baccalaureate pot, hopeful to help bring it to its potential and impact students.  I have started a “Women in Youth Ministry Network”.  I see all kinds of opportunities to connect students with Christ and the Church, to help connect workers with the harvest.  After several difficult years, my vision has returned.  I know who I am.

 

⁹ for a wide door ^[b]for effective service has opened to me, and there are many adversaries. I Cor. 16:9

 

Please.  Pray for me.  Join me.

 

Dottie

 

Financial gifts can be mailing to:

Cross in the City

1320 Scott St.

Pasadena, Tx  77506

This is me!

Today, I'm thankful that God has positioned me for such a time as this. This is a quote from the book "To Transform a City" by Swanson and Williams.
" . . . you know who you are - a select group of people with an overenlarged heart and the capacity to embrace a vision for ministry larger than a single church. You think about the kingdom. You think about the broken. You think about who needs to be at the table. Though often misunderstood and underappreciated (and always underfunded), you have the call of God on your life. We want to encourage you: Don't give up! Cities are the future of the church, and God has positioned you where you are for such a time as this."
Waiting for my time!
Praying for the transformation of Pearland!

See You at the Pole - Pearland

I wanted to post an update on See you at the Pole.

I attempted to put together a support committee for See you at the Pole.  We struggled to meet and we struggled to have a shared vision.  Towards the end of this process, I was a little lost. I was torn between believing that I was trying to force something that God wasn't in and believing that the enemy was so terribly opposed to believers coming together, that he was thwarting our every move.

The numbers are down a little from last year, but I do believe that God is using us.

PHS - 112 students/8 adults

JH West - 14 students/1 adult (no picture)

 

JH East - 200 total

 

Berry Miller JH - 20 students

JH South - about 100 (no picture)

I have no numbers or information on Dawson or Pace or any middle school.

There are outstanding stories. And Pictures. I put everything I could on Facebook, my page, the syatp page, the PHS CITY page and KSBJ.

And I guess, I decided that God was using us to create awareness about See you at the Pole - of it's importance and how God uses it on a campus.

 

And our committee has a plan.  One person is going to contact the School superintendent.  One is going to contact a teacher sponsor for next year.  An other's children are so fired up for See You at the Pole, they have become leaders in their own right!  And another, felt the need to contact the student pastor opposition and let him know how wonderful her school's See you at the Pole was!

 

God is moving.  In us.  In schools.  In Students.  Thank Him.

This morning, DeZavala Middle School

What an interesting morning!  I was to talk about How to grow spiritually over the summer at a middle school (5th & 6th graders) club in Pasadena.

Before I go any further, I need to squash all your misconceptions about on campus Christian Clubs - that they are a "holy huddle", that it is all the Christian kids in one room and they all are solid church kids.  Bah humbug!  I find that the on campus Clubs attract any where from 30% to 90% non church kids.  The presentations need to be about 90% on accepting Christ, how to grow and understanding your faith and finding a church.

So, as of yesterday, I had a fairly traditional presentation about bible reading, attending church and prayer as traditional methods of spiritual growth.  I had a summer bible reading plan so that they could read thru the New Testament over the summer. 

It was safe.  It was easy.  Matter of fact.  God starts hitting me with questions:  Name one time that you experienced spiritual growth while reading the Bible or praying.  Or thru the act of attending church.  That one is closer, because if you knew who I had to put up with while attending church, you would know I had to grow. 

I can't think of a single Bible reading that cause growth in me.  Or a single prayer, except when I got to the point of:  Thy will be done and truly, that was a struggle of wills and preception. 

What cause growth in you? the spirit quietly asks me.  Now, I am terrified.  Do I really have to talk about struggles and pain that bring growth to 5th and 6th graders? 

How about the act of service?  How about loving the unloveable?  Doesn't that bring growth?  How about being attacked by the church?  Back stabbing?  That sure brought a world of growth.  What about living in need?  Painful, but I have had to learn to trust God for what I need.

I'm driving and crying, going to this club, thinking about what has brought precious spiritual growth in my own life and how do I tell 5th graders about that?  How the bible, prayer and church attendance provides the framework for growth thru suffering, love and service?

The good news and the bad news.  The good news:  God used a simple lesson on Spiritual growth to turn everything I believed about spiritual grow upside down.  The Bad news:  Not a single student showed up this morning.  The good news:  I was able to freely minister to the sponsors and they both seem to need it.

Growth.  Who knew what I would learn this morning?